Self-care is a sensationalized buzzword that often brings to mind images of spa days featuring face masks, massages and extreme relaxation. While that can be a part of taking care of yourself, those are not the necessary ingredients to effective self-care. Nonetheless, every one of us, especially as Christians, needs to participate in some form of setting aside designated time solely for ourselves.
“I’m so busy,” a phrase we often hear uttered in passing after being asked, “How are you?” These days it seems as if everyone’s schedule is too busy and everyone is too tired. When we get caught up in the chaotic mess that we call life, we begin to forget that we all need to do is take a moment to stop, pause and breathe.
We put it off by telling ourselves that we don’t have time, or we’ll do it later, until that later hits us full force as we’re running on fumes. Once we are running on fumes, we are not only a disservice to ourselves but others as well.
Our mental, emotional, physical and spiritual health goes spinning into disarray and we become the worst versions of ourselves. However, it is in those moments of intentional pause that one is able to refuel what has been depleted.
“Let’s go off by ourselves to a quiet place and rest awhile,” said Jesus in Mark 6:31-32 (NLT). The passage goes on to say, “He said this because there were so many people coming and going that Jesus and his apostles didn’t even have time to eat. So, they left by boat for a quiet place, where they could be alone.”
This is just one biblical example that showcases Jesus intentionally making time for the disciples to recuperate. At this moment Jesus recognized that for the disciples to continue faithfully adhering to their chaotic schedules of serving and ministering, there was an immense need for the disciples to take time for themselves. Otherwise, we may have gotten a few additional verses featuring hangry and bitter disciples.
While we can eliminate mani-pedis from the list of things the disciples and Jesus did during their time of being alone, we do know that they utilized this time for self-care. They replenished their survival needs by taking time to eat, rest, complete hygienic duties and spend time with Jesus and each other.
As Christians, realigning our faith should play an essential role in our self-care practices because at the end of the day, it is our faith and relationship with God that centers us. It reminds us of our purpose and what we’re called to do.
Through intentionally taking time to restore ourselves by spending time with God, we are sharpening our focus on what’s important, which helps focus our hectic daily lives.
As college students, we often get in the habit of saying yes to every single opportunity offered to us.
“You want to boost your CV by taking every opportunity that comes your way,” said Jesse D. Matthews, a psychotherapist, in an American Psychological Association article. “That breeds the feeling that you can’t say no.”
This is something that I, along with my peers, have struggled with. As a result, finding time to care for myself is something that falls to the wayside.
In this, we’ve created the stigma that making time to take care of oneself is a sign of weakness. So, between multiple leadership positions, working and doing what I came to Asbury University to do — obtain a degree — I often choose to say yes to more and take care of myself less.
I soon learned that this was ineffective and unhealthy and the many things I was juggling began to fall short. It was in this that I recognized that I could not serve well or do what I was called to do if I didn’t take care of myself.
“Plus, by not learning how to say no now,” said Mary McKinney, a clinical psychologist and academic coach, in an American Psychological Association article, “You’re harming your future career, whether you plan to be an academic or not.”
It’s important for everyone to find a method that works for them, whether it be a hike through Red River Gorge, binging Netflix until it’s asking you if you’re still watching, or simply spending time with friends. So just as Jesus and the disciples demonstrated in Mark 6, through having a personal self-care routine, you are able to more effectively take care of yourself so that you can continue to do what you are called to do.